GNOMELAND SECURITY!

GNOME ON DUTY!
Low-Tech Garden Gnome Security Suggestions
If you’re concerned about the possibility of a well-loved garden gnome being abducted from your’ lawn here are a few relatively easy and low-tech ideas to help secure your gnome friend in place.
The Just Say Gnome! website will announce when higher technology gnome-protection options become available here through our developing GnomeLand-Security program. Thank you for your’ patience.
In the meantime here are some immediate precautions and actions you can take:
If you’re concerned about the possibility of a well-loved garden gnome being abducted from your’ lawn here are a few relatively easy and low-tech ideas to help secure your gnome friend in place.
The Just Say Gnome! website will announce when higher technology gnome-protection options become available here through our developing GnomeLand-Security program. Thank you for your’ patience.
In the meantime here are some immediate precautions and actions you can take:
1. The “Tip of the Iceberg” Approach

DIAGRAMS IN PROGRESS
Attach a heavy concrete anchor to the base of your’ gnome. Of course the larger the concrete anchor the more secure the gnome. This approach assumes that your gnome is made of cement (as are all the gnomes of the Just Say Gnome! You will need a bag of cement, mortar, or concrete, a mixing container (i.e. a bucket or wheelbarrow), a shovel, a yard, water, and of course a gnome.
· First dig a hole to the size you plan to make the anchor. Of course you will want to make certain that you’ll be happy with the position of the gnome because this anchor will make it a whole lot harder to move.
· Second, mix up the cement with water and any aggregate materials you choose to add * follow the instructions on the bag and be sure to wear an appropriate mask or respirator. Pour the well-mixed cement into the hole in the ground where you want to secure the gnome.
· Then prepare the base of your Gnome by brushing off any loose dust and then [very important!] wetting the base of the gnome – where he or she will be bonded to the cement anchor – this is very important because the new cement of an anchor will not bond nearly as well to a dry surface as to other moist cement. And attach the gnome to the anchor
· Cover the anchor with earth where it is not bonded to the gnome; and, if necessary, support the gnome with rocks or other supporting objects to insure that he or she sets into the right position.
· While regular cement or concrete sets up to a semi-solid condition within a half hour to an hour it can take a day or more for the cement to substantially harden. But if you are particularly concerned about drying speed I would highly recommend Rapid-Set brand Cement-All for its very quick drying time and extreme hardening.
· While this gnome-security method will not absolutely prevent a gnome’s abduction it will certainly frustrate all but the most dedicated gnome abductor/‘liberator. One improvement to this approach that Just Say Gnome! Is currently considering developing is a version of our gnomes with a simple hole in their base in which a standard one-foot piece of metal rebar can be attached – to serve as either a basic post to insert in the ground, or a yet-stronger link to a bellow ground cement anchor.
line).
· First dig a hole to the size you plan to make the anchor. Of course you will want to make certain that you’ll be happy with the position of the gnome because this anchor will make it a whole lot harder to move.
· Second, mix up the cement with water and any aggregate materials you choose to add * follow the instructions on the bag and be sure to wear an appropriate mask or respirator. Pour the well-mixed cement into the hole in the ground where you want to secure the gnome.
· Then prepare the base of your Gnome by brushing off any loose dust and then [very important!] wetting the base of the gnome – where he or she will be bonded to the cement anchor – this is very important because the new cement of an anchor will not bond nearly as well to a dry surface as to other moist cement. And attach the gnome to the anchor
· Cover the anchor with earth where it is not bonded to the gnome; and, if necessary, support the gnome with rocks or other supporting objects to insure that he or she sets into the right position.
· While regular cement or concrete sets up to a semi-solid condition within a half hour to an hour it can take a day or more for the cement to substantially harden. But if you are particularly concerned about drying speed I would highly recommend Rapid-Set brand Cement-All for its very quick drying time and extreme hardening.
· While this gnome-security method will not absolutely prevent a gnome’s abduction it will certainly frustrate all but the most dedicated gnome abductor/‘liberator. One improvement to this approach that Just Say Gnome! Is currently considering developing is a version of our gnomes with a simple hole in their base in which a standard one-foot piece of metal rebar can be attached – to serve as either a basic post to insert in the ground, or a yet-stronger link to a bellow ground cement anchor.
line).
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2. The Psych Out Approach

Purchase a used but non-functioning security camera from a used parts or technology store and position the camera in a very noticeable position pointed right at the gnome.
3. Adaptations of Traditional Approaches:

VICIOUS 'DEATH POODLE'
A. Set your gnome near to or attach your gnome to a post or other object to which a guard dog is tied.
B. Attach a regular home or car security alarm to the gnome or place the gnome on a pressure-sensitive alarm model.